I dont lie. But ada sekali tu la Im lying to the strangers but bila difikirkan Im not actually lied to her. She created the lies herself (hurm boleh lak camtu? hahaha)

Situation in the bus
A: Kak,akak na gi kuantan area mana?
B: Akak keje. Suami keje jauh. Tu yang naik bus tu.
A: Ta tanya pun pasai suami *dalam hati okay*
B: Adik na kemana?
A: Saya na balik kolej.
B: Oh belajar lagi.
A: Yela,takkan lecturer pulak *dalam hati lagi*
B: Belajar kat mana?
A: KPM kak.
B: Oh matriks.
A: *senyum je*  
B: Lagi berapa tahun?
A: Setahun setengah kak.
B: Ha yela,matriks ni kan paling lama pun dua tahun camtu je kan.
A: *senyum senyum dan senyum*

See,I dont lie guys hahaha. Im just too tired sampai na borak pun ta berminat. Evenla borak tu hobi -.-' And somehow I feel sorry sebab dia ingat ily ni matriks student but at the same time I feel sorry to myself jugak sebab kene borak dengan akak ni all the way to Kuantan. I did gave clues A LOT to her yang I dont have mood to talk and all. But dia..ta perasan -.-' 

I am not a liar but if by lying can protect my family and friends' heart,

I will. Undoubtedly.

Love is not about bila kita rasa gembira je. 'love could hurt so much..oh so much..' kata lagu kat radio ni. So love juga could hurt so much. Out of love equal to sakit. Sebab ia nya sesuatu yang menyakitkan,ily tana orang yang ily sayang rasa macam ni. Tipulah if I dont wish karma hits sufi balik,kalau boleh biar karma buat sufi berganda ganda. But lagi lagi lah tipu if I want to see him suffer the way I am sekarang. (sebab ia memang sakit,syg) So I found it in my heart to forgive him but yelaa its hard to forget kan? But tape,take one step at a time,ily.

p/s: may Allah always protect your heart from frustration and heartache,syg. Amin.
p/ss:  lagu kat radio ni memang selalu senada je dengan mood kita kan? macam tahu tahu je -.-'

'Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation' -Rumi

Obviously true. Thats why I cant get over you easily. Mostly sebab I love you not with my eyes,ofcourse. Its not that you are not handsome (for me you are already what I need syg,really) but I love you because I love you. Wholeheartedly,and definitely I love you with all my soul (you know that). But now this quote makes me wonder,if you can say goodbye to me,then,all these time..you are not loving me with all your heart and soul,or what? 

sincerely,
the silly me-that thought you are sincere loving me-when you are not.

assalammualaikum semua,
even yela siapa je baca ni,maybe tade pun yang baca but 'salam' tu wajib hihihi. so apa kabar semua? (again,rasa macam sesia tanya but still na tanya jugak even tade respond hihihi) 

so again why im here? basically because i feel today i need a space untuk bebel (boleh ta alasan ni?) you know,life since sufi tade is not easy. da tade sape da na dengar kita bebel. even yes,dulu dia dengar pun sebab tpaksa but yela,still ada orang yg tadah telinga jugakkan? 

so far my life is good,Alhamdulillah. yela,walaupun not that good,sebab losing someone you love is not somethg good you see. but again Alhamdulillah Im still breathing. despite of all nonsense plans dulu like terjun jambatan pulau penang (mati kalau dilah tbaca post ni hahaha) 'sorry dilah,tu masa memula ja time frust,la ni takdaq dah' *smile bitterly*. 

but yela,sapa ta rasa rasa camtu? i never imagine my life without sufi. never ever. so when he walks away without diri ini merelakan,diri ini harus redha. wajib redha,exactly. so now you guys mesti tahu why im here kan? yes i need space. to let it all out; my sad feeling and yes,how i miss sufi actually. ini bodoh,i know. rindu pada yang da tade. but,i guess im not good in saying goodbye.

p/s: im sorry post ni sounds _____
p/ss: i miss you

dreamt of you,
wake up with tears falling down my cheeks,
but its normal baby,so normal for me,
and you know why its happening,
its you,all because of you.

i miss you.

Random

I don't know what am I doing right now,
after have been awhile 'abandoning' this blog,
I come here again, but without you.

Maybe I need a space,
To let all the sadness inside my heart out,
Because I can take no more,

This sadness is too hard to handle,
And even I smile,
I die a little inside.